Lately I feel like my spirit has been put to the test, and what I am able to handle has been maxed out. It's a feeling that can be all too familiar. I suppose it is like the "rule of 3", you know the one that says that bad things happen in 3's. Well, my threshold has recently been pushed and I feel like the one thing you can do at times like this is remember "this too shall pass".
Taking on more responsibility at work, my father becoming a short-term resident in the hospital, and a break up to boot! Needless to say, the last few weeks haven't been ideal for me. But it was over the last few weeks that I felt a fight. I felt something in me pushing me to not get down on myself, not give up and to not give in. Did I cry? Sure. But there was no way I was going to let these things pile up and keep me down. This was the first time in my life I decided I wasn't going to let these events change me or alter my personality. I think it may be because it's the first time that in all the chaos in my life, I did NOTHING wrong. There was nothing I could have done differently in the case of my dad, short of going to medical school and revolving my life around curing him. In work I knew and know that more responsibility will allow me to grow with the company and prove my willingness to work and do so under pressure. And in the case of the missing lover- well, it was most definitely his loss, and I tried to be understanding sweet and supportive, but he chose to walk away without a word. ****(Written October 9 2012)
WOW. I just re-read that post (realized I never published it after I wrote it) and smirked. Here I am exactly a year later and my Dad is in great health, I'm working toward a promotion at work, and my love life is going swell. It's almost comical to look back at what I was facing and think about how far I've come and how much I've accomplished in the last year. I actually think it is therapeutic to look back and reflect on how life was and how things are now. I'm proud of who I am today and pushing through what I thought were my 'limits', only to discover that I am limitless.
Smile through diversity, because if you are facing a tough time, fake it until you make it. Whatever you are going through, someone else has been there and survived, so don't worry- you got this. So smile and hold your head high, because when you come out on the other end, you'll be stronger and more in tune with what you can accomplish.
